On Apathy and Japanese Parties

"the world is your oyster, and you're allergic to shellfish." - Paul Neilan, Apathy and Other Small Victories

I have to say, I have never read a book that I have immediately connected to and felt as if this book was written about my life... until today. As I was frantically reading this satirical novel all day, I felt as though I was a serial killer reading A Catcher in the Rye for the first time and realizing that I would forever be remembered for my actions and all three of my names. But of course, I am not a serial killer, and never will be. Yet, this book reached out to me. I feel as if this book was meant as a complete farcical judgement of the world around this main character, Shane; whose drifting and apathetic nature gets him into trouble.

I know that this is not a character with whom most people would not want to associate. I am not really sure how this George Castanza-esque character appeals to me, but I feel as though he was based off of the thoughts that constantly swarm my brain. My actions are not in line with this character's but I find myself wanting to say the things he says and do the things he does, or does not do--to be more accurate. I can only really articulate that this book was clearly written for insane people, by an insane person. Never once before have I felt the desire to reread an entire book the moment I finished it. I sat at my desk all day today and read this whole masterpiece.

For any of my friends who have ever asked me, "what are you thinking?" ...this book can sum it all up. It is funny, dark, sadistic, and brilliant. I have only praise for this book.

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As for more recent events in my life, I had the closing/end of the year party for the teachers at my visit school. I felt like being one of the team and I forked over 70 dollars to eat and drink as much as humanly possible with people I did not know. Nearly all of the teachers from the school were there and I was seated at a table with a bunch of drunks who did not speak English. This was okay with me. I tend to associate well with people show up to all you can drink drinking events already blitzed.

The night began as any other drinking party. Food and Japanese swill-water, being passed off as real beer, was circulating around the room. After about an hour of food and drink, the party games began. So, in this medium size banquet hall at the New Shim Miyako hotel in Kyoto Station, there were trivia games being played about certain facts about school life. All very uninteresting, from what I could understand. Every once and a while english teachers and teachers drunk enough to attempt english would wander by my table and pour me a thimble full of swill and tell me they want to teach me Japanese bamboo painting. I nod and smile, thinking to myself, "why the hell are the glasses so small?? It is going to be a long night if this is all I am going to get."

After the trivia there as a stop watch game where people had to stop the stopwatch closest to 20 seconds without going over. Also very uninteresting, but at least they let me participate this time. I failed. Miserably.

After that, bingo. Yes, grown-up Japanese people love bingo, especially when they are so drunk that standing up is one step from falling down, grabbing the cheesy shag carpet to keep from falling off the face of the earth. But there were prizes. Lots of prizes. I won a very masculine bento/lunch box and a handy carrying case. And as a going away present i received an emotially fickle plastic Santa Claus filled with extra large imitation M&Ms. They were quite disgusting.

Overall, it was fun watching my other teachers get so drunk they could not stand up. It was not so fun being the mascot for my table, but such is life. I got to make fun of my principal a little bit and practice my Japanese. What else could i ask for on a Friday night?

Gio