The Great 2009 Jenga Hustle

It was a dark and cloudless night. The spirits were numerous on this All Hallow's Eve. Greasers, students, ducks and girls in bear costumes were roaming the streets in droves. But this is not a story of fright and other such base human emotions. This is a story of loss, con, and trickery.

I had seen him in the bar before, skulking in the plentiful shadows, surveying the room. At the mention of his game of choice, a spark ignited in his eyes. Opportunity. Upon choosing his target group, he gives the bartender a slight nod and a raised eyebrow. She casual reaches under the bar and pulls out a small red box filled with small rectangular blocks of wood with a strange incantation engraved on the sides, Jenga.

As she approached the target group with the hustlers ammunition in tow, a faint but recognizable smirk appeared on the hustler's face. It was the smirk of experience. A smirk of victory.

The group, a greaser, a high school student, and a recently decapitated duck, unwittingly set up their game to enjoy a few minutes of board game splendor in the dark recesses of bar, as the hustler stalked and noted his strategy. After a few excited moments as the tower collapsed, the hustler staggered over to the table, clearly feigning intoxication. He slammed his glass down as an introduction, the tower shook.

The Proposal
He stated in an unclear and slightly slurred speech,“Care to make a wager?” The three looked at each other suspiciously...“What could this drunk possibly want?”All three of them thought. “I want to play Jenga with you. If the three of you can beat me, I will buy you each of you a drink. But if I win, the three of you will buy me two drinks.”The hustler gargled out. Of course at this point, the three knew that this guy was a hustler, but agreed anyway for sake of an interesting story, such as the one I am telling you right now.

In an attempt to not get cheated, though they knew it was coming eventually, the costumed three argued over the rules with‘Josh’the hustler. 1) You can use only one hand to remove the blocks. 2) You must put the spent blocks back on the top, perpendicular to top row. 3) You cannot remove blocks from the top row. Three terribly simple rules. Terribly over simple rules.

The game began. On his first move, the hustler removed a block and twisted the tower. It was at this point that they knew for sure that the game was over. Thought they fought a valiant battle, the costumed three eventually were defeated and paid the hustler his two drinks. He stepped up from the table, money in hand, and walked to the bartender. They exchanged a glance and a handshake. It is uncertain if that was all that was exchanged...

The Background
I have had many experiences in my relatively short life on this planet. But there is one emotional experience I have always wondered about. That is the emotional, physical and physiological response to getting hustled by a hustler. Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought I would encounter a hustler in Japan, so I was caught when the action happened. I smelled a fish from the beginning but could not resist to promise of free drinks.

For those of you who do not know what a "hustle" is, I suggest you look up The Hustler with Paul Newman and Jackie Gleason. If you do not know what Jenga is...jump off a bridge because you have been missing out on one of the most amazing games to ever grace the planet.